Chris' Blog

WWF Grand Slams

It’s time for another classic WWF Coliseum Home Video release. This one is called Grand Slams and the box is bright yellow with George Steele, Kamala and King Kong Bundy on the cover. That’s a good sign, two of my favourites right on the box. Advertised matches include Bundy winning in 9 seconds, Iron Sheik winning the Title, Mr Fuji and Mr Saito winning the Tag Titles, Andre versus 3 opponents and Mene Gene in the ring. Wait, Mene Gene in the ring? Really, this is going to be something to see as Gene teams with Hulk Hogan to face George Steele and Mr Fuji! It’s funny because I just added a Mene Gene LJN figure to my collection this weekend! Let’s start rolling the tape!

 The opening video is missing sadly and starts with Gene who mentions there have been 34 tapes released so far, and other then Wrestlemania 1 and 2, I’ve covered them all so far. The Mania’s are coming later, as I have the master tapes from the original Closed Circuit versions coming after this is done. Gene goes over some of the moments we will see on this tape and it’s some classic moments coming up. Sadly Gene talks about who wins each match as well. This is all clips I guess as Gene says we have over thirty big moments coming in just over an hour, so I probably won’t rank anything

1. Nikolai Volkoff v. Dynamite Kid

 This is from the Wrestling Classic, and is quick and painless. Dynamite catches Volkoff with a dropkick off the top rope while he’s still singing the Russian Anthem and scores the pin. No rating as the match never started. Nikolai has no idea what happened as he leaves the ring confused.

1. Dynamite Kid pinned Nikolai Volkoff

2. Tito Santana v. Greg Valentine

 In the steel cage, Tito is trying to regain the title. Tito climbs the cage and Greg goes after him, Tito kicks him down and drops to the floor for the win and the title. Greg is furious and smashes the IC title repeatedly in the post and Tito tries to save the belt but it’s too late. the belt is destroyed.

2. Tito Santana beat Greg Valentine in a cage match

3. King Kong Bundy v. S.D. Jones

 From Wrestlemania, Bundy catches him in a bearhug, drives Jones into the corner. Bundy follows with the Avalanche and Big Splash for the quick win. WWF claims this was nine seconds, but was closer to thirty, still a quick match.

3. King Kong Bundy crushed S.D. Jones

 We go to Roddy Piper on the set of the A-Team as he insults Mr. T. This was the big set-up for the first Wrestlemania as Piper continues to goad T into a fight. T says what he does is real and Piper faces wimps, Piper makes fun of Cyndi Lauper as well which really angers T. Piper makes fun of T’s hair and that’s all T needs to take a swing at Piper.

4. Wendi Richter v. Spider Lady

 Here it is, the original screwjob. Wendi came in as the champion and thought she was a big deal, she demanded more money thinking she was on par with Hulk Hogan. Vince decided he had enough of her ego and this match was the end of Wendi in the WWF. Wendi in control as we join the match, Wendi goes for a slam and Spider rolls her up in a small package, Wendi kicks out at one but the ref keeps counting. Gorilla is confused as is Wendi who rips the mask of Spider and reveals it’s Moolah. Wendi slams Moolah and covers her, but the match is over and Wendi has been screwed out of her title. Even Howard Finkle is confused as he announces the winner and new champion.

4. Spider Lady defeated Wendi Richter

 Time for some classic TNT footage as Fred Blassie and Friday bring out a chicken in a pen. Kamala is brought out and Fred says it’s feeding time for the big man. Fred says Kamala will eat the chicken alive as Friday hands it too him and we cut to commercial. When we come back Kamala has feather all over his face.

5. Danny Carpenter v. Haiti Kid

 Midgets, it had to be midgets. I hate these matches, they are so stupid and a waste of time. Haiti starts out by biting the read of Carpenter and then follows with a slingshot and then repeats the move, Danny lands on the ref and Haiti counts three. I can’t believe this was considered comedy, the worst part of the eighties were these matches. Thankfully it cuts off before the match ends.

 We follow that with clips of title changes, first Iron Sheik beating Bob Backlund for the WWF World Title. Sheik wins when Bob’s manager tosses in the towel costing Bob his World Title. Next is Mr Fuji and Mr Saito winning the Tag Titles from Tony Garea and Rick Martel. Strange seeing Rick Martel in the WWF pre Can-Am Connection/Strike Force. Fuji uses the salt to blind Martel so Saito can pin him. The Wild Samoans drop the Tag Titles to Rocky Johnson and Tony Atlas in a No disqualification match, as Albano accidentally hits his own man with a chair and costs them the tag belts. We head to Wrestlemania as Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff winning the Tag Titles from Barry Windham and Mike Rotundo, as Sheik nails Windham with Blassie’s cane for the victory. We get comments from the new Tag Champions, as Blassie says there is no controversy as his men won the titles. Now it’s Randy Savage winning the IC title from Tito Santana in Boston Garden, Savage nailed Tito with a foreign object as Tito tries to suplex Randy back in the ring and stole the championship. We see a camera man holding the object as Randy clutches his newly won title while Elizabeth helps him out of the ring.

 Now we get to see Terry Funk as he beats the daylights out of ring attendant Mel Philips for wearing his hat. Classic Funk moment as he slaps Mel and pulls him in the ring and then unloads on him. Oddly we have a female ref who has no idea hat to do, as Terry strips Mel, Terry’s opponent tries to make the save and gets tossed out. Mel gets tossed out right along with him, and there are no blue mats.

6. Terry and Hoss Funk v. Tito Santana and Junk Yard Dog

 Coming to us from Wrestlemania II, Terry and Tito start and Terry gets clotheslined out of the ring. Hoss comes in and gets dropkicked out with his brother. Clip forward to JYD with a small package and all four are in the ring, with the ref distracted Terry gets the megaphone from Jimmy Hart and cracks JYD with it for the win.

6. Terry and Hoss Funk defeat Tito Santana and Junk Yard Dog

 Jesse Ventura challenges Ivan Putski to an arm wrestling contest, as Jesse comes in he checks the chairs and table to make sure everything is the way he likes it. Ivan is ready and tells Jesse to lock up with him, Jesse stalls and this angers Polish Power. They finally lock up and this time Ivan stalls, which infuriates Jesse who starts having a tantrum. The challenge is finally underway and Jesse starts out strong but Ivan quickly turns the tables on Jesse who of course cheats to get the advantage back. Ivan comes back again so Jesse pulls him across the table and smashes the chair across his back repeatedly.

7. Andre the Giant v. Johnny Rodz, Jack Evans and Joe Butcher.

 Andre gets piled on from all three, but he kicks them all off and then headbutts them all. They again try to triple team him, but Andre tosses them away. Andre piles them on top of each other and then sits on the pile for an easy win.

7. Andre the Giant beats Johnny Rodz, Jack Evans and Joe Butcher

8. Superstar Billy Graham v. Bruno Sammartino

 Superstar pulls Bruno out of the ring and tries to tie him up, but referee Gorilla Monsoon stops him. Bruno makes the comeback with a series of big boots and slams, Superstar bails out but Monsoon goes after him and scoops him up, slamming Superstar back in the ring. Bruno continues to unload and the match is stopped due to Graham’s blood loss.

8. Bruno Sammartino beats Billy Graham

9. Andre the Giant v. Gorilla Monsoon

 Really old footage, as this is a boxing match from Puerto Rico. Gorilla knocks down the Giant early on, and continues to clobber Andre in the corner. Andre has had enough as he headbutts Gorilla down then hits the butt splash. Clip forward as Gorilla continues to unload on Andre, and Lord Alfred on commentary is laughing his ass off. Andre finally gets a shot in and that’s all it took. After the match Gorilla finally back up and goes after Andre outside the ring, Andre clobbers him again sending Monsoon flying into a puddle!

9. Andre the Giant knocks out Gorilla Monsoon

 Gorilla Monsoon calls out boxing legend Muhammed Ali, who gets in the ring. They circle each other and Gorilla brushes off Ali’s jabs before catching him in the airplane slam. Gorilla says a boxer can’t beat a wrestler as he calls wrestlers the ultimate fighters.

10. Hulk Hogan v. Iron Sheik

 The most famous moment of all time as Hulk powers out of the camel clutch and drives Sheik back in the corner. Hulk quickly drops the big leg and scores the legendary pinfall which kicked off the era of Hulk-a-mania and changed wrestling forever.

10. Hulk Hogan pinned Iron Sheik

11. Hulk Hogan and Mene Gene v. George Steele and Mr Fuji

 Coming to us from Minneapolis, Minnesota as Gene makes his in ring début. We clip to Fuji kicking Hogan, who Hulks up and fires back. Fuji goes for the salt, but Gene smacks it away. Hulk shoots him and moves so Gene can hit a smack. Gen tagged and slammed on to Fuji for the win. Nothing scary then Gene in his underwear!

11. Hulk Hogan and Mene Gene beat George Steele and Mr. Fuji

12. Killer Bees versus Hoss and Jimmy Jack Funk

 From the Big Event in Toronto, Ontario. Just have to say, had the chance to see the Bees and Demolition in person this weekend, and the Bees are really nice guys. Very well spoken and have some great stories from this era. The Bees continue to sting Dory with their speed but Hoss makes the tag, however the Bees double team Jimmy Jack and Brunzell gets a sleeper on Jimmy Jack. Blair gets the ref distracted which allows Hoss to make the save and now the Funk’s finally have control, which they maintain with some great dirty tactics. Jimmy Jack slams Brunzell on the floor, and while the ref admonishes him this allows the Bees to put their masks on and switch guys. Blair in their now, under the mask and unloads on both Funks with clotheslines and quickly locks on the abdominal stretch but Jimmy Jack breaks it up. The Bees switch again and roll up Jimmy Jack for the cheap win, to the crowds happiness.

12. Brian Blair and Jim Brunzell defeat Hoss and Jimmy Jack Funk

13. 20 Man Battle Royal

 Pretty much a who’s who of wrestling in this match, as I see Adrian Adonis, Tony Atlas, S.D. Jones, Jimmy Snuka, Ivan Putski and Pedro Morales among others out there. We clip to Pedro being eliminated, clip some more to Greg Valentine dropkicked out by Jones. Leaving S.D. Jones and Tony Atlas as the final two, they hug and decide to flip a coin to decide the winner! This would never happen nowadays, Cena would just toss out whoever for the win, friends be damned. Atlas gently press slams Jones over the top for the win.

13. Tony Atlas wins the 20 Man Battle Royal

14. 20 Man Battle Royal

 I wish these were uncut, as this is from Wrestlemania II and features NFL stars as well as WWF stars. We join it with Big John Studd tossing out Refrigerator Perry, who then illegally pulls out Studd. The Hart Foundation bounce out Russ Francis, and this leaves the Hart Foundation with Andre. Jim Neidhart eats a big boot and oversells it by jumping over the top rope, Andre tosses Bret off the top rope onto Neidhart for the win.

14. Andre the Giant wins the 20 Man Battle Royal

15. 22 Man Battle Royal

 Our third badly edited/clipped battle royal which features everyone major in 86, from Bundy and Studd to Moondogs and Valentine to managers like Bobby Heenan, Johnny V and Jimmy Hart. We clip to the end as we’re down to Greg Valentine, Junk Yard Dog and Jimmy Hart who’s been hiding under the ring through the match. Greg and JYD battle on the ropes and Jimmy pushes them both out for the easy win.

15. Jimmy Hart wins the 22 Man Battle Royal

16. Andre The Giant v. Killer Khan

 A Mongolian Stretcher Match as Khan faces the angry Andre who’s leg he broke a few months earlier. Andre just destroys Khan but Khan refuses to be stretchered out of the ring so Andre continues to beat on him. Andre his the butterfly suplex and then follows with a butt splash and a big splash. Khan finally stretchered out of the ring and Andre wins.

16. Andre the Giant beat Killer Khan

17. Andre the Giant versus Big John Studd

 Andre kicks Studd in the leg as we’re joining this match from Wrestlemania I. Studd put of 15 thousand dollars while Andre put up his career, as he chops Studd repeatedly in the corner. Andre scoops and slams Studd with ease for the win and starts tossing the money out to the crowd.

17. Andre the Giant beat Big John Studd

 We now get a old school interview with Vince McMahon talking with the Grand Wizard and Crazy Luke Graham. Vince asks about Luke cheating to win the match and Wizard says Vince needs his eyes checked and there is no truth to what he says. Wizard says Vince is a Bob Backlund fan and calls him despicable. Wizard holds a sign that says manager of champions, and Vince asks if he paid someone to hold it up, Wizard says Vince makes his own awards and that they are the two most popular men. The Grand Wizard was amazing on the microphone, makes me miss old school managers.

 Mene Gene announces the Manager of the Year award for 1985, as Bobby thinks he’s the winner. Gene says Lou Albano is tied with Heenan, so Hillbilly Jim gives him his vote and the win. Heenan snaps and smashed the trophy on both men. Big John Studd and King Kong Bundy charge the ring and destroy Jim.

 We see Jimmy Snuka accidentally sends Don Muraco out of the cage, costing him the match. Snuka throws Muraco back in the ring and suplexes Muraco down. Snuka ascends to the top of the cage and hits the epic Superfly Splash from the top of the cage. A moment that Mick Foley talks about often, and for good reason, it’s one of the most famous moments of the pre-Hulk Hogan era.

 That takes us to the closing credits for the tape. Well, wasn’t one of the best tapes as it was just a serious of clips but some classic moments highlighted. Our next tape should be a much better outing as we have Hulk-a-Mania II coming up next!


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