Chris' Blog

TNA Impact – March 22, 2010


After a very impressive PPV last night, TNA rolls on as we head to the next PPV Lockdown. Last night on Destination X we saw the impressive win of Kaz in the four way ladder match to become number one contender to the X title. A title still held by Doug Williams who won after bloodying Shannon Moore and smearing makeup on his face. Tara was able to fend off “Zombie Hot” Daffney in a great women’s match, after which Daffney stole Poison. Also the tag team champions Hernandez & Matt Morgan were able to defeat Beer Money but after the match Morgan gave his partner the Carbon Footprint and walked out with both titles. Where does this leave the tag team titles? Finally Abyss was able to send AJ Styles straight to Hell through the ring winning the match but not winning the title, which was kind of a letdown. The show ended with Abyss and Hulk sending Desmond Wolfe & Ric Flair through the hole where AJ went and standing tall in the ring. Tonight, we begin to build to Lockdown and should get some answers to the tag situation and what happened to Poison.

1. We open Impact with Eric Bischoff in the middle of the ring playing guitar? Yeah, this is different I guess, not in a good way but different. Wasn’t even sure I downloaded the right show at first, this goes on for about a minute and a half. Eric says that it was a song he wrote himself and there is a lot of things people don’t know about him. Eric says he’s a classically trained musician and that’s why he hates Jeff, because he uses the guitar as a gimmick. Maybe we’re going to get a Guitar Hero battle in the ring! Eric calls Jeff to the ring to play the guitar, wow three minutes in and I have a headache, a new record! Jeff Jarrett reluctantly makes his way to the ring as Eric says he didn’t think Jeff had the guts to come out. Eric asks Jeff if he has a little stage fright and says he knew Jeff wouldn’t be able to prove anything. Jeff says if Eric thinks he’s going to humiliate him he has another think coming; Eric says Jeff doesn’t have the stones to knock him out. Jeff turns away and Eric dares him, Jeff grabs the guitar and raises it over his head, rears back and shakes his head before lowering the guitar. The crowd boos Jeff as he drops the guitar and leaves, Eric says he knew Jeff couldn’t do it and the best thing he can do is go home and tell his little girls he doesn’t have the stones to do what he should do. Eric says that’s why he’s running the company, as Jeff suddenly storms back to the ring while Eric has his back turned. Jeff comes in and grabs the guitar, and shatters it over the head of Eric Bischoff and the crowd explodes. Jeff leaves the ring as Eric Bischoff is knocked out in the middle of the ring. Mick Foley backstage applauds Jeff Jarrett and they embrace. Jeff asks if he knew how good that felt, and Foley says he knows. After the commercial we see Eric slowly coming too, looks like he got cut just over the right ear. Eric tells Jeff he crossed the line, and both Jeff and Foley crossed his line and he could fire both of them but he won’t. Eric says he’s going to enjoy this and make it fun for him, tonight Jeff Jarrett and Mick Foley will face each other in this ring and he doesn’t care who wins or loses because who ever loses is fired. Ooh, a pink slip on a pole match, didn’t Foley do that with Jarrett. Eric says the winner will be his bitch, and Foley says the celebration was cut short. Jeff says it was his fault, Foley says they both knew what they were doing when they attacked Eric.

2. Velvet Sky, Madison Rayne, Lacey Von Erich & Daffney v Tara, Taylor Wilde, Sarita & Angelina Love. Well, I like team number one, always happy to see Zombie Hot Daffney!! The Beautiful People are terrified of Poison and Daffney as they hide on the outside. While Daffney is in the ring Tara comes charging down the aisle and goes after Daffney. Daffney puts down Poison and threatens to squash it, causing Tara to drop to her knees. This allows the Beautiful People to do a four on one beatdown on Tara, as her teammates charge to the rescue. Well, nice to see Sarita & Taylor, why don’t they get more TV time? We have chaos as all eight are brawling as we go to commercial. We come back and Angelina is laying a beating on Madison. Taylor tagged in and comes in via the top rope. Taylor with an atomic drop and a kick to the ass. Velvet tagged in and Taylor with a neckbreaker quickly gets a near fall. Sarita tagged in and Velvet with a snapmare and a kick to the back of the head then tags in Lacey. Lacey shot to the corner and jumps over Sarita, but gets caught celebrating as Sarita dropkicks her into her corner. Lacey quickly tags in Madison who charges at Sarita who trips her and tags in Tara who comes in with a slingshot legdrop for a near fall. Tara with a side headlock, shot in and Daffney clobbers Tara from behind. Now it’s another four on one on Tara as the faces have the ref, and Madison gets a near fall. Madison tags in Daffney who picks up Poison and dangles it over Tara, Tara grabs her by the throat and Daffney stretches out for a tag to Velvet. Velvet stomps Tara, who fires back but gets caught by Rayne. Rayne and Velvet hold Tara as Daffney charges but Tara fights off and all hell breaks loose. Angelina and Daffney alone in the ring as Angelina hit the Beauty Mark on her, but Velvet slides in and drops her with DDT. Taylor quickly comes in and nails a Northern Lights Suplex, but Madison breaks the hold and nails a facebuster. Madison turns into a double underhook powerbomb from Sarita, but Lacey slides in and chokeslams her. Sarita rolls out and Tara catches Lacey in the Widow’s Peak. Tara goes to save Poison but gets caught from behind by Daffney who hits a perfect rolling cradle Suplex for the victory!! 8.25/10 a great fast paced women’s match, simply amazing. This is how you use the women; see they can go more than sixty seconds if you let them. We now see AJ Styles getting out of a van and he’s got an arm in a sling and using a crutch, along with Ric Flair still in the wheelchair. I thought that was toilet paper hanging from the chair, it looks like the tags on the wheelchair.

3. Hulk Hogan & the Monster Abyss makes their way down the ramp. Hulk has his first TNA shirt on, and calls Abyss big brother and says he has TNA on fire. Hulk says it got personal with him and Ric Flair, and Eric Bischoff was right when he said Flair knew each and every button to push on Hogan. Hulk says when Abyss and himself were laid out it was strictly personal, and tonight Eric learned the personal stuff won’t work. Hulk says he vows to Dixie to get this company in order and it be only business. Hulk introduces Abyss as team captain for Team Hogan to face Team Flair; I hope this doesn’t mean Hulk and Flair going to wrestle again. Abyss says he hopes AJ and Flair decided to stay at the hotel and crash, or he’ll crash through the Impact Zone. Abyss says he felt the power went he sent AJ through the ring, and that’s when he realized he wasn’t just Abyss, but the Monster Abyss. Abyss says he didn’t win the title, but he won his respect and it’s a new day and at Lockdown he’ll take care of business for Hulk. Abyss steals Boogeyman’s line and says he’s coming to get you. Start the Boogeyman rumors now! This brings out AJ Styles and Ric Flair, who’s being pushed in his wheelchair by Chelsea. Ric Flair says Lockdown is in Flair Country and he’s a cage match specialist and Abyss could not finish the job because they’re not mortals they’re wrestling gods. AJ says he had Abyss beat until Hulk got involved and Abyss tried to cripple him. Flair says to ensure victory for Team Flair the captain will be…Sting! The lights go out and when they come back on Sting is in the ring and AJ cracks Abyss in the back of the head with the crutches while Hulk has been double cuffed. AJ stomps on Abyss and taunts Hogan, who can’t do anything. AJ laying a beating on Abyss, and suddenly out comes the Pope to make the save. Pope hammers Styles and sends him into Hulk’s big boot. Pope hits the double knee to the back and unlocks the Hulkster. Abyss points at Flair, and Hulk raises Abyss and Dinero’s arms. Chelsea can’t get Flair out of their fast enough and she bails on him, Hulk grabs the wheelchair and sends him back towards Abyss who clotheslines Flair out of the wheelchair. Pope channels his inner Ted DiBiase and stuffs the money in the mouth of Nature Boy. After the commercial we see Jeff Hardy, Shannon Moore & RVD arriving.

4. Tyson Tomko v Rob Terry. The black hole of suck has opened in Orlando; we have a match of disaster. Tomko hits a quick shoulderblock and Terry doesn’t move. Terry with a big clothesline and another clothesline in the corner. Terry scoops up Tomko and hits the falling slam and follows with the spinkick, which looks impressive for his size. Terry with the one handed spinebuster for the easy win. DUD that was bad, but at least it was quick. Tomko, aren’t you glad you came back to TNA? You’re the Barry Horowitz of TNA now! We see the guest refs for Jeff and Foley, Beer Money Inc.

5. Jeff Jarrett v Mick Foley. This was set up earlier by Eric Bischoff, with the loser fired and the winner is Eric’s bitch, also Beer Money ref. BMI check the combatants and ring the bell, Roode leaves the ring and Storm stays as the inside ref. Jeff extends the hand and Foley obliges, as they lock up and a clean break. Another lockup and they wind up in the corner and roll to the other corner, Storm calls for a break, and we get another clean break as we have dueling chants already. Foley with a side headlock, and shot in Foley comes back with a shoulderblock taking down Jarrett. Jeff now with the side headlock and he cranks it in, but Foley sends him in and nails a big elbow. They circle again and Jeff kicks Foley but gets sent in, and comes back with a sunset flip for a two. Foley with backslide for another near fall; Foley pops JJ with a pair of rights and Jeff in the ropes. Foley continues to hammer Jarrett and goes for the double arm DDT, countered to the Stroke but Foley counters out. Roode grabs the ankle of Jarrett and while Jeff is distracted Foley clocks him in the back and kicks him out of the ring. Foley quickly follows and pounds Jarrett outside the ring as we see Eric Bischoff heading to the announce table as we go to commercial. We come back and they’re brawling at the top of the ramp. Jeff sends Foley down the ramp and nails a Suplex right on the ramp, vintage Foley. They finally get back in the ring and Jarrett continues the offense on Foley and gets a near fall. Foley struggles to get up and Jarrett takes him back down for another near fall as Eric says he can depend on Beer Money. Jeff uses the ropes for leverage as he tries a pin, but Foley able to kick out and Jeff hits DDT in the middle of the ring for another near fall. Jeff leaves the ring and grabs a chair and slides back in and swing but Foley catches him and nail the Double Arm DDT for a near fall as JJ gets his feet on the ropes. Foley brings out Socko and applies the Mandible Claw on Jarrett who tries to grab the ropes and Roode kicks his arm. Foley drops down and applies the cobra clutch with the claw, but JJ fights his way out. Foley picks up the chair and charges at Jeff who gets the feet up and Jeff nails the Stroke for the win. 8.25/10 this was a good match actually, a very good brawl. Jeff wins and puts his head on the turnbuckle, looking distraught. Foley comes over to Jeff and hugs him and raises his arm. Jeff turns around and raises Foley’s arm and they shake hands. Beer Money mockingly cries as does Eric Bischoff, as Foley hugs Jeff and leaves the ring. Eric yells at Mick good luck in your future endeavors as the crowd chants “Thank you Mick”. Eric has the microphone and tells Beer Money to get Jeff Jarrett and they beat down JJ. Storm wedges the chair in and Roode tosses him head first into it, and out comes Jeff Hardy & Rob Van Dam to make the save! Beer Money bail out and they check on Jeff Jarrett, as RVD has a microphone. RVD introduces Jeff Hardy and himself and says they’re just looking for a little fun, and what a blast they could have kicking Beer Money’s ass tonight. Beer Money says you want it you got it. After the commercial we see Mick Foley saying goodbye to Angelina, Taylor, Sarita, Rob Terry, Dinero, Abyss, and Jeremy Borash, as Bubba the Love Sponge stops him and asks about the match. Foley says he has a list of people to talk to and Bubba’s not one of them, Bubba mouths off to Foley and Foley clobbers the overrated sack of crap! Eric comes in Hulk’s office and says Foley was just a distraction and now he’s gone. Hulk says Eric got what he had coming, but now Foley’s gone and it’s over. Eric says he should be more patient, Hulk says it’s not patience it’s business and personal. Hulk tells Eric to lay off Jarrett and Eric says he can do it and they shake hands. Eric asks about Hardy & RVD and asks if Hulk set it up, but says never mind. Christy is with Beer Money who faces Hardy & RVD, Roode says they’ve been a little busy tonight but that’s the way they like it. Roode says he’s had time to reflect on what’s important and that’s putting Beer Money first. Storm says he doesn’t care about the people out there because they are the greatest tag team ever, “Sorry about yo damn luck!” JB is with Hardy & RVD, as Hardy is applying his makeup and says he knows about tag team wrestling and knew this would happen. RVD says this isn’t their first shindig and they know what they are doing. RVD says they’re going to show the Impact Zone what they’re all about.

6. Matt Morgan v Hernandez. Morgan comes out with both titles and as he poses at the top of the ramp Hernandez nails him from behind. Hernandez pummels Morgan down the ramp and whips him in the ring. Hernandez hits the big shoulderblock and Morgan bails out, but Hernandez follows. Hernandez continues to pound Morgan and rams him into the steps as they brawl around the ring. Morgan gets his back rammed into the ring apron and sent back in the ring. Hernandez enters as Matt begs off, and he’s bleeding from the mouth, Hernandez doesn’t care as he kicks Matt in the face. Hernandez wraps the shirt around his neck and launches him across the ring and then does it again. Morgan slowly gets up in the corner and Hernandez hits the Stinger Splash followed by a spinebuster. Hernandez sends him to the corner and goes for the splash again, but Morgan backdrops him over the top to the floor. Hernandez grabs the legs of Matt and pulls him out, but misses the clothesline and hits the post. Morgan hits the Carbon Footprint driving Hernandez head into the ringpost. Matt slides in the ring and the ref goes to check on him and rings the bell. 6.75/10 was starting out good, but the fake injury ending ruined it. They bring out the stretcher for Hernandez, as we see his former partner Homicide run down to check on Hernandez as well. We go to commercial and when we come back they’re still loading Hernandez on the stretcher, after another commercial break they’re finally loading Hernandez into the meat wagon. We see Dixie Carter, Hogan, Homicide and Shannon Moore back there checking on Hernandez. Hulk asks if someone called his wife, as they’re really making it look legit, with Tazz calling him Sean. Tazz takes off his sunglasses; it must be serious, as Tenay says they don’t want to speculate on things. From this we get a recap of the reunion of the nWo, time to fast forward.

7. Beer Money v Jeff Hardy & Rob Van Dam. We need a name for Hardy and Van Dam, maybe the High Rollers? Kronik 2010? Pot and Pills? Weed & Speed? The Flamers? Ok, never mind. Hardy & Storm start the match, and Storm quickly kicks Hardy and lays the rights in. Storm sends him into Roode, but he slides under and pulls Roode down, then backdrops Storm onto Roode while he’s on the apron. Hardy reaches under the ring and grabs a ladder which he places between the ring and barricade as we go to commercial. We come back and RVD in the ring with Roode who rams him in the buckle and sends him to the corner. RVD gets a back elbow in followed by the moonsault, but Storm tagged in and they double team RVD. Storm slaps RVD and comes off the ropes, but RVD catches him with a spinkick. Hardy gets tagged in and nails an inverted atomic drop followed by a legdrop. Hardy with a front layout Suplex and covers, but Roode breaks the count and Van Dam takes out Roode. Tenay announces next week’s main event is Tara versus Daffney in a first blood match, HOLY SHIT! That’s going to kick ass!!! Meanwhile, back to the match at hand, Roode with a nice neckbreaker on Hardy for a near fall. Roode makes the tag and they double team Hardy, Storm taunts RVD and locks in the sleeper on Hardy. Jeff tries to fight out and Storm pulls him down by the hair and tags in Roode, who mocks RVD. Roode with a rear chinlock as he wears down Jeff Hardy. Hardy fights his way out and nails a jawbreaker and comes off the ropes, but Roode nails a spinebuster. Storm gets the tag now and holds Hardy from his partner and stomps down Hardy, then back to the sleeper. Hardy once again fights his way out and Storm misses a clothesline, but they both connect with a crossbody and both men are down. Roode comes in while Jeff make the tag and the ref doesn’t see it, and they double team Hardy while RVD is with the ref. Storm back in and unloads on Hardy, who continues to play Ricky Morton in this match. Storm goes for the Eye of the Storm, but Hardy slides out and hits the Whisper in the Wind and both men are down again. Both men make the tag and RVD with a pair of clotheslines then a superkick on Roode. RVD hits the monkey flip and jumps up top, and comes down with the thrust kick and Storm breaks the pin. Storm eats a big kick and gets slammed down, as RVD hits the split legged moonsault but wrong guy. Roode clotheslines RVD down and sends Jeff to the corner. Storm hits the kick and they double Suplex Hardy. Roode catapults RVD into the DDT of James Storm for a near fall, damn that looked cool. Roode goes for the fisherman Suplex, countered to the Twist of Fate and Storm pulls out Hardy and whips him to the ladder. Jeff slides under it and kicks it into Storm as RVD hits Rolling Thunder on Roode. Jeff hits the Swanton Bomb and RVD follows with the Five Star on Roode for the win. 9/10 amazing tag match, very impressive. Great seeing RVD back on TV and what a great match. That’s how you do a tag team match and a main event for TV. Much better than the lame ass snoozefest we had on RAW of Batista and Cena at this time. We see Eric Young slide into the ring and he grabs the microphone. Eric says he’s going to keep it short and he talked to Hulk, next week we have a six man tag, Waltman, Hall and Nash versus Eric Young, Jeff Hardy and RVD. I’m so happy to see Eric Young in the main event; the kid deserves it big time! Been a fan of Eric’s since getting to see him wrestle at a local show and he was such a nice guy.

Match Recap:

1. Velvet Sky, Madison Rayne, Lacey Von Erich & Daffney beat Tara, Taylor Wilde, Sarita & Angelina Love 8.25/10

2. Rob Terry squashed Tomko DUD

3. Jeff Jarrett beat Mick Foley 8.25/10

4. Matt Morgan and Hernandez went to a no contest 6.75/10

5. Jeff Hardy & RVD beat Beer Money Inc 9/10

What a great show this was actually, very enjoyable. This was much better than RAW was this week, as we had three great matches. The women really blew me away, and showed that’s how you use your women. The Terry squash did what it was meant to do, show Terry as a powerhouse, and at least it was quick. Jeff and Foley tore each other apart in a great brawl, much better than I expected. Morgan & Hernandez was going well, but the injury angle was dumb. The tag main event was spectacular, that is how you do a main event on TV. Main events of TV are not supposed to be fifteen minutes of talking, but a good solid match. Watch and learn WWE, this is how you do Monday nights. Next week’s knockout match is gonna kick seven layers of ass! My girl Daffney taking on Tara in a First Blood Match, I can’t wait for that! What a freaking awesome show, score it 2-1 TNA!


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