Chris' Blog


Friday Night Smackdown – March 19, 2010

 

Tonight’s the second to last episode of Smackdown before Wrestlemania, and as it stands so far we have no diva matches at the PPV. This needs to be fixed immediately, not that they’d get sufficient time to put on a good match. Besides the fact that the two best female wrestlers are currently injured and won’t be at Wrestlemania, Melina & Mickie, it makes it hard to find a match that might be good. I expect them to do a tag match of some sort, probably won’t be announced till next week’s Smackdown. If they do a tag match it’ll probably be Michelle, Layla & Melina against Gail, Eve & Kelly. They really need to unify the titles and just move all the divas to RAW, there’s just not enough to warrant two titles. Also it seems like the Smackdown title match is being shunted lower and lower each week, as they’re now talking about the three main events of Wrestlemania being Cena/Batista, HBK/Undertaker, Bret/Vince and not Edge/Jericho. Personally I’m more interested in seeing Edge and Jericho then the other three matches, as both men can put on a great match, but I’m betting it gets the least amount of time of the four matches. Lots of guys so far not scheduled for Wrestlemania, wonder if we’ll get the return of the dark match battle royal? Mark Henry, Khali, Kofi, Tatsu, Regal, Jackson, Kozlov, Archer, Hart Dynasty, Cryme Tyme, Masters are all unscheduled for the big show. That’s a lot of guys not getting a Wrestlemania bonus, so I’d be surprised if they don’t do a battle royal this year. Well, let’s focus on tonight’s episode of Smackdown as I only know one match tonight, McCool & Layla versus Tiffany & Phoenix, which I guess means Phoenix is now a good girl? She’s better off as a tweener feuding with everyone and attacking random people, but at least she gets TV time. Maybe if they can do an eight diva tag for Wrestlemania and add Vickie to McCool’s team and Phoenix to Gail’s team. Let’s be real optimists and make it elimination, let it go about twenty minutes and end with McCool and Beth, with Beth winning and uniting both belts into the real Women’s title! Never happen, but would be nice.

1. Matt Stryker & Todd Grisham open the show with their sad puppy dog faces and voices as they talk about Rey Mysterio being humiliated by CM Punk. We then get a long drawn out recap of the most boring segment on WWE TV since Katie Vick. Even Punk can’t save this garbage; we all know he’s going to lose at ‘Mania, since Rey never loses anymore. We then come back to the arena as Rey Mysterio comes to the ring. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, you can’t be an underdog if you always win. Why not call Triple H the Cerebral Underdog, or Undertaker the Dead Underdog? Wait that last one sounded really badly didn’t it? Anyway here comes Mr. 619 all in black, which means he’s being serious tonight, to cut a promo almost as bad as one Juventud could do! Stryker calls this Mysterio’s time of anguish, why is CM Punk claiming to be Domenic’s daddy, that hasn’t been done in about five years! Maybe they could use the daughter instead this time? Rey says he’s climbed a lot of mountains and taken beatings, he forget to mention he’s used the death of a friend to win a world title and be booked as champ worse than Sheamus was. Rey accepts CM Punk’s challenge for Wrestlemania, and it’s not just going to be any match, Rey wants a street fight. Looking at Rey, maybe it should be a Sesame Street fight, special guest referee Grover? This brings out the Straight Edge Society, as our savior stands at the top of the ramp and asks Rey if he’s a little emotional tonight. Punk calls Rey a coward and Rey says you have to be human to feel what he feels and Punk’s not human. No he’s not Rey, he’s a savior! Rey starts talking in Spanish to Punk and says he’s going to head up the ramp and Punk tells him if he does there won’t be a Wrestlemania match, and says if Rey touches him there won’t be a match. Punk says he sees potential in Rey if he could just see the Straight Edge in him and then shows pictures from last week. Punk mocks Rey for hiding last week and tells him he’s not a superhero and didn’t make the monster go away and shows Rey hiding his daughter’s face. Rey’s acting ability is right up there with Brooke Hogan’s, seriously is he angry or does he have to pee? Punk says if Rey accepts him as his savior his family can respect him, and Rey say they are nothing alike, Punk says that’s because he is Straight Edge and better than him. Punk says if Rey joins the Straight Edge Society he can live up to the superhero myth, and Rey tells him he is out of his mind and says that will never happen. Rey tells Punk if he doesn’t accept the challenge he’ll have to face him every day; didn’t he already accept the challenge? Punk says he pities Rey and pitches an idea for tonight, if Rey can beat Gallows tonight he gets a street fight but if he loses and then loses at Wrestlemania he’ll have to join the Society! So now it’s not going to be mask versus hair? Rey says tonight he’ll beat Luke Gallows and then make sure Punk never forgets the beating he gets at Wrestlemania! Hope they actually give this match plenty of time; it could be a good match.

2. MVP & Matt Hardy v Jack Swagger & Dolph Ziggler. Well this might be a good tag match, four great talents in one match! Ziggler and Matt lock up, and Ziggler with an armbar, Matt counters but Dolph fights out. Dolph sent in and Matt hits a back elbow then drops a pair of elbows then a big leg drop. Matt gets sent back to the wrong corner and Swagger tagged in, but Matt catches him and hammers him. Matt sent to the corner and Swagger charges but Matt gets the boots up, however Swagger grabs the legs and spins him around, then pulls Matt to the mat by his hair. We go to commercial and when we come back Swagger has a chinlock on Matt, who fights out. Swagger slams Matt down and hits the Vader Bomb for a near fall, as the announcers go over the MITB winners and combatants. Swagger goes for the gut wrench but Matt counters out and both men make the tag. MVP with a nice belly to belly and follows with a series of elbows and follows with the balling elbow. MVP goes for the Playmaker but Swagger distracts him and Matt spears out Swagger, but the distraction costs MVP as Swagger hits the Zig Zag for the win! 6.5/10 a good tag match, but a little too short was about four minutes, would’ve been better had they had about fifteen minutes. After the match Ziggler and Swagger head up the ramp, but Ziggler turns around and grabs a ladder from under the ring. Ziggler puts in the ring and sets up the ladder in the middle of the ring and climbs to the top. Ziggler pulls down the briefcase and sits atop the ladder, wonder if this is a premonition of what we’ll see at ‘Mania! We go backstage to Teddy Long with Drew McIntyre, who says Teddy wanted to see him. Teddy says he’s impressed he’s still ‘technically’ undefeated as Mr. McMahon expunged his two loses and gave him an easy opponent to get him in the MITB. Teddy says Drew is undefeated, until tonight and Drew asks what he means. Teddy says he was thinking about streaks and mention Undertaker and Drew says Vince wouldn’t want that match. Teddy says he was unable to contact Vince so tonight Drew faces The Undertaker tonight. I bet Shawn gets involved in the match!

3. Layla & Horseface McCool v Tiffany & Beth Phoenix. Well, now the two idiots have shirts that say “Glam-a-Man”, boy that’s a brilliant line. How much do these writers get paid to think of this crap? Tiffany looks hot as always in that tight purple top and a little white mini skirt! Beth and Layla start out and Beth quickly overpowers Scary Spice. Beth with a vintage airplane spin shades of Mike Rotunda and Layla in the wrong corner gets clotheslined. Tiffany tagged in, comes in via the top with a nice crossbody for a near fall. Tiffany with a pair of back elbows and then follows with a Suplex. Tiffany hammers Layla and sends her to the corner, but Layla sends her to the apron and nails a big kick. Tiffany catches Layla with a hotshot, but horseface nails her from behind. Layla throws Tiffany back in the ring and tags in horseface, and sends Tiffany into her clothesline. Horseface with a series of knees on Tiffany and then throws her to the mat. Beth wants in as horseface misses a big elbow drop and the Glamazon tagged in. Beth runs over horseface and backdrops her down hard. Beth laying a beating on the overrated sack of trash and hits a perfect slingshot Suplex, shades of one of my all time favorites, Tully Blanchard. Layla comes in the ring and Beth presses her over head, but this allows horseface to kick her in the gut. Horseface goes for the Styles Clash, but Beth counters and sends her into the ropes. Beth nails the Glam Slam on horseface for the victory! 6.5/10 not a bad match, but I just completely despise McCool. Vickie comes out bringing the show to a screeching halt, literally and figuratively. Vickie tells Tiffany to get to the back, because Beth owes her an apology. Beth tells Tiffany to leave as Vicki enters the ring. She gets bigger every week; seriously, somewhere there’s an all you can eat buffet in L.A. that’s out of business now! Maybe that was the earthquake they felt, Vickie walking down the street! Beth says she apologized for what she did last week in the office and Vickie says it wasn’t good enough she needs to do it in front of everyone. Beth says she was wrong to touch her and for that she apologizes, Vickie says it was still unacceptable and she’ll regret the day she touched her. That’s because now she’s sticky from the BBQ sauce on Vickie! Vickie says she’s her superior in more ways than one, and next week she’ll be in a match with her. How much you want to bet she winds up becoming the unified champ if they ever do that?

4. Cutting Edge with Chris Jericho. Edge starts out by saying last week Jericho had him on his show, so this week he decided to return the favor and brings out Chris Jericho. Jericho comes out with his NXT protégé, Wade Barrett, who stands behind Jericho. Edge says Jericho brought his own guest and they look like they’re ready to go to the prom together. Edge says they are both master manipulators, and what’s going to happen next as he compares it to chess. Edge says he’ll get the last move and he thinks Jericho knows what that move will be. Jericho says Edge is wrong and the ultimate opportunist has made the ultimate mistake bringing their whole match down to one move. Jericho says there is more to it than that, as he says he is the champ and it’s Wrestlemania, and asks Edge if he can live up to the hype. Jericho says Edge may not be 100 percent at Wrestlemania and asks him if is still injured. Jericho says he saw Edge tear his Achilles in one accidental step, and asks what will happen if Jericho tears it on purpose and tells him his career will be over. Edge asks Chris if he wants to hurt him and says he may have come back too soon, but no one knows and there is only one way to find out as he dares Jericho to go for it. Jericho just stands there and Edge says he knew it and pummels Jericho then goes after Barrett. This allows Jericho to nail Edge in the ankle and now they double team Edge, but he fights back. Edge tosses out Jericho and then spears Wade Barrett, welcome to Smackdown Sparky! Edge turns around right into a Codebreaker from Jericho, who stands over the fallen challenger. Jericho stomps the ankle of Edge and then mocks Edge by saying spear.

5. The Hart Dynasty v John Morrison & R-Truth. Why the hell is the Hart Dynasty not on Wrestlemania? Seriously? That pisses me off to no end; Kidd is one of the best in the WWE right now and won’t even be on the PPV. I’d even be happy to see him in the MITB at least. Truth and Smith start the match, and Truth gets the advantage and tags in Morrison and they nail a double dropkick. Smith fights back and nails a perfect belly to belly Suplex and sends Morrison to the corner. Kidd tagged in and stomps the crap out of JoMo and follows up with a choke. Kidd with a snapmare/dropkick combo gets a near fall. Kidd hammers the face of JoMo and goes for a belly to back, but Morrison counters and tags in Truth. Kidd has no idea the tag was made and Truth nails the Lie Detector for the quick win. 1/10 would’ve been a lot higher had it gone more than two minutes. What a massive waste of talent that was.

6. Rey Mysterio v Luke Gallows. All those who think Rey is going to lose raise your hand; I assume no one raised their hand. Rey in his WCW tribute colors tonight, purple and yellow, what is he doing campaigning for the return of Wildcat Willie? Rey uses his speed to avoid Luke but Luke able to catch him and whips him to the corner. Rey moves and Luke hits the buckle and Rey quickly hammers the bigger man. Luke gets a knee in and now overpowers the masked midget. Luke shoots him in and misses a clothesline as Rey comes back with the head scissor takedown, sending Luke to the ropes. Rey goes for 619, but Luke catches Rey in a tilt a whirl backbreaker. Luke sends Rey to the corner hard and then slides him out of the ring and quickly follows. Luke picks up Rey and drops him on the barricade as the ref starts the count. Rey slides in the ring at the nine counts and CM Punk is furious as we go to commercial. We come back and Luke has the bearhug on Mysterio, who fights his way out. Luke sends him to the corner and sets him on the top rope. Luke goes for a superplex but Rey counters the move, like he’d have to power to stop that move. Rey headbutts Luke to the mat and follows with the seated senton and follows up with a springboard crossbody for a near fall. Stryker calls it unique offense, maybe if it’s the first time you’ve ever seen Rey, otherwise it’s the same shit each week. Luke gets the knee in and sends Rey to the ropes and presses him overhead and drops him. Luke lands a big splash for a near fall, as Punk screams at the ref. Luke charges in the corner but Rey gets the boot up and hits a bulldog on Luke. Rey hits a springboard legdrop and Luke able to kick out just in time. Rey hits a dropkick to Festus’ ass and hits the 619 but Punk distracts the ref and Serena pushes Rey off the top. Luke makes the cover and wins the match! 5/10 same old cookie cutter offense from Rey, but the end was a shock. So it won’t be a street fight at Wrestlemania, which means the mask v. hair might just happen. After the match Rey jumps Luke and pounds on him outside the ring. Punk and Serena just sit on the apron and watch as Rey is destroying the much bigger man, thus destroying his credibility in every way. Rey is finally pulled off of Luke as Punk shakes his head looking at Rey sadly.

7. Undertaker v Drew McIntyre. Well, we have five minutes left for the main event, that doesn’t bode well for the rating. Short matches are rarely any good, unless everyone in it sucks and you just want it to end, meaning any match with Cryme Tyme! Undertaker quickly goes after Drew who slides out, Undertaker follows and Drew goes back in. Drew goes to drop and elbow as Undertaker comes in but Undertaker stays out and pulls Drew out with him. Undertaker quickly hammers the undefeated Scotsman and throws him back in. Undertaker hits a corner clothesline and shoots Drew to the opposite corner, but Drew reverses. Drew charges in and eats a boot, Undertaker off the ropes and Drew nails a powerslam. Drew quickly mounts and punches the Dead Man, but as he argues with the ref Undertaker sits up. Undertaker quickly unloads on McIntyre and tosses him over the top rope and follows. Undertaker tosses Drew back in the ring and drops the apron leg drop and slides back in. Undertaker hits the chokeslam and signals for the Tombstone. Undertaker hits the Tombstone on Drew for the easy victory, killing any momentum Drew may have had. DUD basically a squash. So we build a guy for months so Undertaker can destroy him, great booking jackasses. This is why I’m sick of the WWE and its piss poor booking. Seriously, they did the same thing last year with Kozlov, built him up undefeated for like eight months and he gets a match with Undertaker and gets crushed and has yet to recover. After the match Undertaker gets to the top of the ramp and looks back at the ring, and Shawn comes from backstage to attack Undertaker. Undertaker catches him and goes for the Tombstone but Shawn slides down and hits Sweet Chin Music on Undertaker. Shawn screams at Undertaker he is done and stands over Undertaker.

Match Recap:

1. Jack Swagger & Dolph Ziggler beat MVP & Matt Hardy 6.5/10

2. Beth Phoenix & Tiffany over Michelle McCool & Layla 6.5/10

3. John Morrison & R-Truth squashed the Hart Dynasty 1/10

4. Luke Gallows upset Rey Mysterio 5/10

5. Undertaker crushed Drew McIntyre DUD

This was another throwaway show, as the WWE seems to be on autopilot leading to Wrestlemania. Honestly the build for three quarters of the matches at Mania have been a joke. The only matches they seem to want to focus on are Vince/Bret and Shawn/Taker. This really shows the biggest problem in the WWE right now and yes I’ve said this before and I’ll repeat it until something changes, the same old people on top. When we do get someone new on top, Sheamus, they book him so poorly he was better off on ECW. Drew was being booked to perfection and they make him lose twice, expunge the losses and then let him be crushed by Undertaker. Why not have Drew score an upset win on Undertaker, making Undertaker doubt himself about beating Shawn, would’ve been a lot better than just killing the guys push. Right now as far as Wrestlemania goes the only matches that look interesting are Jericho/Edge and MITB. Sadly I expect Jericho/Edge to be the afterthought of the show and probably will be third or fourth match of the night. I expect the card to go; Tag, MITB, Legacy, Jericho/Edge, Women (if we get one), Rey/Punk, HHH/Sheamus, Cena/Batista, Vince/Bret, and Shawn/Undertaker close the show. They should be focusing on the MITB match, as that is where the future of the company lies. Other than Kane in the match, any of the other eight guys would make great champions, but will any of them be allowed to break the glass ceiling? If Christian wins, maybe we can get a Christian/Edge feud, but I’m sure one of the bigger names would interject themselves into the feud. The WWE needs to start building their future stars, and not crush them while doing so, because guys like Batista, Undertaker, Cena, HHH and HBK won’t be there forever. Well, I hope the final week to Wrestlemania we get four good shows, but I won’t hold my breath on it.

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