Chris' Blog


TNA Impact: Where the women are given more then sixty seconds for a match!

TNA Impact – February 11, 2010

With tonight being the last Impact before the next PPV most of the show will probably just be build up for it. Hopefully we can still have a few good matches, but I’m not optimistic. Let’s see what TNA has planned for us for tonight.

We open with a recap of the Mick Foley/Eric Bischoff storyline, which would be a huge draw if either guy was able to do a good match. We see the attack on Kevin Nash by his “friends” Scott Hall & Sean Waltman, which I hope doesn’t mean we’re going to have a tag match between Foley & Nash v. Hall & Waltman, but it sure looks that way. Nice to see Kong still in the opening video, maybe they’re hopeful she’ll come back. Mike Tenay & Tazz announce we will find out who fills the remaining spots in the tournament for this Sunday night.

1. Hulk Hogan comes out to nWo knockoff music, as Tenay talks about Kurt Angle’s outrage and distrust of Hulk Hogan. Hulk welcomes the crowd to their Impact zone and says the place is cracking? He says he has his swagger on and hanging and banging, which just paints a bad picture of him and Jack Swagger in the showers. Just saying is all. Hulk calls TNA the in place to be and he’s cool again. He used to be cool and hip, now he’s just cold and has bad hips. Hulk says the Impact Zone is on lockdown and no gets in or out, which means Hall and Waltman are getting in. Hulk says he understands taking someone out or getting even, but what X-Pac did was unacceptable in TNA. So you can nail someone with a barbed wire baseball bat or a chair, but X-Pac’s kicks are wrong? Hulk threatens to put the red and yellow on and do what he has to do, God help us all. Suddenly out comes Eric Young, time for some True Canadian Violence from my local hero! The crowd chants underrated, as Eric says he won’t waste Hulk’s time but he’s friends with Nash and friends are hard to find. Eric says he wants X-Pac and Hall in the building so they can get what’s coming. Eric tells Hulk he’s going to learn he’s not afraid to get his hands dirty. Hulk says he may have just come in but he knows what’s going on and talks about Team Canada and World Elite and says he knows Eric. Hulk says Eric and a handful of other guys are the reason he came to TNA. Hulk tells Eric he better know who he’s talking to and he gave the Band their last warning and it’s done. Eric responds by saying out of respect for Hulk he won’t do it here and Hulk is the reason he’s in the business. Eric says if Hulk won’t let them in, he’ll do what Nash would do and go to them. Hulk tells Eric he won’t do it on his watch and can do it off the property and bust them up. Hulk shakes hands with Eric Young and leaves the ring. We now see Foley backstage looking for Eric Bischoff and then he is directed to his office. We see Hall and Waltman stalking around outside. If they don’t work there, why is there a camera following them? I just add too much logic to Russo’s overbooking.

2. Orlando Jordan v D’Angelo Dinero. Didn’t we just have this match; yeah we did as we get highlights of their previous encounter. This is a qualifier for the tournament, and if Pope loses I riot. Seriously he beat the champ last week, he cannot lose her, but with Russo booking he probably will. They lock up and wind up in the ropes and around the ring they go. The ref wants a clean break and Pope slaps OJ, and another lockup as D’Angelo with an armbar into a side headlock. Jordan fights out and hammers D’Angelo now then whips him in, but reversed and Pope with a pair of deep armdrags. Pope catches OJ with a series of elbows to the head sending OJ to the corner. OJ gets a cheapshot on Dinero then chop block on the knee and follows up with a nice dropkick to the face of the Pope. OJ stomps Pope but Pope tries to fire back and OJ answers with a swinging neckbreaker. Jordan with a spinning backbreaker as the crowd chants “You still suck” at Jordan. OJ waits for the Pope to get up and opens up but misses one shot and now Dinero starts to hammer OJ and nails the inverted atomic drop followed by a flying forearm. Dinero chops OJ who lands on the ropes, and Dinero nails the Coronation for a near fall. Jordan lands a chop to the throat of Dinero and a nice spinebuster for a near fall of his own. Pope pulls himself up in the corner, and OJ starts to jab at him, but Dinero reverses and almost knocks out OJ in the corner. Dinero quickly nails the double knee to the back for the win. 3.75/5 a very good match as the Pope qualifies for the tournament on Sunday. We now see Jarrett coming into Eric’s locker room, and Jarrett says he knows what Bischoff is up to. Jeff says he hopes he delivered for Bischoff, who says he hasn’t enjoyed a match more in ten years. Eric says he is impressed and may have underestimated how valuable Jarrett is to the company. Eric calls Jeff a world class athlete, and Jeff says he is happy to have made headway and would like to be in the tournament. Eric asks if he thinks he’s ready and Jeff says he is ready. Eric says he has to get the most out of everyone and has to protect them, but says Jeff being number one contender is not starting at the bottom. Eric tells Jeff he needs to work hard and be a good employee but he will not be in the tournament. Jeff leaves dejected as Eric laughs at him.

3. Suicide v Matt Morgan. Can we please end this damn Suicide character, seriously this is annoyingly bad. This is as bad as Curry Man and Super Eric was. Matt quickly overpowers the masked man and sets him on the top rope. Suicide dives over him and quickly dropkicks the big man, but Matt catches him coming back and nails the fall away slam. Morgan rams Suicide’s head into the buckle and nails the rapid fire back elbows. Matt nails Suicide with the Avalanche, then the side slam drop. Morgan with a huge headbutt sends Suicide to the ropes and Morgan nails the legdrop on the ropes and winds up on the floor. Matt quickly back in the ring as Suicide pulls himself up in the corner. Morgan misses the Avalanche and Suicide with a hotshot followed up with a springboard dropkick, but Morgan quickly back up. Suicide comes off the ropes and Matt goes for the chokeslam, but Suicide flips out. Suicide comes off the ropes and Matt catches him with the Carbon Footprint for the easy win. 1/5 almost a squash, as Matt qualifies for the tournament as well now. We see Foley entering Bischoff’s office and says he is willing to do whatever Eric wants as long as assures him that JB and Abyss are safe. Eric says he is thrilled that Foley came to this decision and is a man of his word. Eric says Abyss is now in the tournament Sunday, and his opponent will be Mick Foley. Foley says he’ll start getting ready, but Eric says two more things. Eric says it’s time to retire the flannel, it’s too 70’s and Foley say’s it’s more 80’s or 90’s. Eric says if there are any shenanigans tonight Abyss will be unmasked next week. Ok, confused now, is the match tonight or at the PPV? I thought Eric said at the PPV, but Foley said he’d get ready for tonight? I don’t know what the hell is going on. Tenay fills us in, it’s at the PPV. Our first round matches are Pope v. Wolfe, Hernandez v. Morgan, Angle v. Anderson, and Abyss v. Foley. Well, that actually doesn’t look half bad; this might be a good tournament after all. Of course this means no tag team championship, as they will be facing each other. Christy is now with Anderson & Angle, who are teaming tonight, as she asks how they will function as a team. Anderson gets her name wrong and says he’s had to carry so many partners is back has been broken five times, and at the PPV he will win the tournament. Christy looks hot in that purple shirt, just saying is all. Angle gets in Anderson’s face and says he will have eyes in the back of his head and if he screws him he will snap his ankle tonight. Angle walks off and Anderson mocks him, Ankle comes back in and makes a snapping motion. The microphone drops down suddenly and he does his usual name shtick. We now see Eric Young and Angle in the locker room, as Angle says he appreciates what Eric wants to do but he says it’s not a good idea. Eric says Hulk could be setting them up and tells Eric to stay in the locker and he’s going out there.

4. Amazing Red v Doug Williams. This is a rematch from when Doug cashed in the briefcase and won the X title from Red. Doug quickly goes the leg, but Red kicks him and uses his speed to take out the legs of Williams. Red dropkicks Williams who falls to the floor, and Red springs over the ropes, lands on the apron as Williams quickly back in. Red goes for the sunset flip, countered by Doug, but Red counters, and now Doug grabs the legs, but Red rolls him up again. Red goes for the Hurricanrana, but Doug catches him in a triple wheelbarrow slam. Williams with a flying forearm as he slows down Red now, and locks in a head scissors on the former champion. Doug moves into a side headlock, as Red fights out, but one uppercut from Williams takes down Red. Williams drops a knee for a pair of near falls, as Doug lifts up Red and sets him in the corner. Doug with a cross corner whip, followed with the running knee to the chest and Doug climbs the ropes. Red nails him with a spinning kick sending Doug to the floor, and now Red follows with a spinning corkscrew plancha on Williams. Doug slides in and Red comes in from the top and nails the missile dropkick for a near fall. Doug in the corner and Red dropkick him into the corner and follows with another spinkick for a near fall. Red goes for the hurricanrana, but Doug counters and Red counters again with a roll up. Red with a koppo kick and the goes up top and dives down, but Williams moves, however Red rolls through and charges at Doug in the corner. Doug moves and Red hits the post and Doug nails the rolling German for the win. 4/5 great TV match, very quick paced and impressive. Williams is actually a pretty impressive wrestler when not saddled down with Magnus or Terry. We go to Angelina Love and Tara, Angelina looks amazing as always! Christy asks about their history and Angelina says there is a lot of history and she says when Tara first came in she didn’t like her, but water under the bridge. Tara says the plan is simple tonight, it’s going to get ugly, Angelina says real ugly. Maybe we’ll get another nipple slip, like last week. It was a nip slip, as it aired uncut in the UK version.

5. Velvet Sky, Madison Rayne & Lacey Von Erich v Tara & Angelina Love. Well, four of the hottest in wrestling in one match, so this should be fun at least. As long as they keep Lacey’s involvement to a minimum, should be watchable. Velvet and Tara start out as Velvet dances in front of Tara, who quickly brings in Angelina and Velvet runs. Angelina goes after her, as Lacey comes from behind she hammers her, kicks Madison, but the distraction costs her as Velvet nails her and snapmares Love down. Velvet chokes Angelina with her own hair, well that’s a new one, then whips her in but Angelina comes back and Velvet bails out again. Angelina grabs Madison by the hair and pulls her in. Madison eats turnbuckle and Tara tagged in, comes in with a sunset flip for a near fall. Tara with a pair of armdrags followed by a float over Suplex into the guillotine. Madison grabs the ropes and Tara yanks her off hard then slaps Madison’s beautiful face sending her to the floor. The Beautiful People regroup as Lacey lets loose the swears, meanwhile Angelina and Tara do a double baseball slide sending all three into the barricade as we go to commercial. We come back as Tara is chopping Madison on the ropes, Tara gets whipped in and Lacey grabs the ankle allowing Madison to get an advantage. Tara now gets triple teamed, which is every man’s fantasy with these three! Velvet stands on Tara’s hair and pulls her up, then tags in Lacey Von Erich. Lacey climbs the ropes and nails a moonsault/elbow combo, which was kind of cool looking. Lacey rams Tara’s head into the mat and tags in Madison, as they utilize their advantage in this differently abled match. Madison whips Tara in and both connect with a clothesline, and now both are down as we get a look up the shirt of Tara. Angelina and Velvet tagged in, as Angelina levels all three of the Beautiful People. Angelina spears Velvet as Lacey breaks the pin and Tara grabs Lacey, but Madison jumps on the back of Tara. Angelina nails the pump kick on Velvet and covers her, while the ref is busy with Madison and Tara, Lacey nails Love with the Ugly Stick and Velvet makes the cover for the win. 4/5 a very good knockout match, that’s how you use the women. Vince take notes you shaved ape, a match with women can indeed go over 90 seconds! It’s possible and you have the talent, just remove the pickle and maybe your brain can breathe again. Just saying is all. Lacey and Madison help Velvet up as they stand over Angelina, Tara slides in with the Ugly Stick. She stalks Lacey but Madison chops the knee and now they work her over with the Ugly Stick. We go to Christy Hemme with Desmond Wolfe, who’s teaming with Hernandez tonight. Desmond says a famous American said life is like a box of chocolates, and Desmond says not true. Life is like a poker game, and he says some may think it’s a four of kind, but one has to be one top, himself. Desmond says he nearly put out Angle, tells Hernandez to go back to Mexico and makes fun of Anderson’s yelling of the name. Desmond says he proved how dangerous he is and tonight the three of them will be lucky to make it to the tournament. We see Hall and Waltman still sneaking around the outside of the building.

6. Desmond Wolfe & Hernandez v Kurt Angle & Ken Anderson. I assume Angle is outside looking for Hall & Waltman and won’t make it to the match, wouldn’t surprise me. Desmond comes out without his valet this week, damn she’s hot. Hey, look Angle’s not looking for nWo; he’s coming to the ring. I’m surprised; it seemed like a perfect idea for them to pull that. Anderson & Hernandez start out, and Anderson works the leg of Hernandez who comes back with a big splash in the corner. Hernandez with the shirt tosses on Anderson sending him across the ring. Hernandez sets up for the Border toss, and Anderson slides down and makes the tag. Angle comes in and hammerlocks Hernandez, who counters and Angle grabs the ropes. While the ref is busy Desmond nails Angle and tags himself in. Desmond with a wristlock takedown, then into the wristlock, he repeats the move as he works the arm of Angle, and Desmond does it a third time. Angle shoots him into the ropes and catches Wolfe with a German Suplex, Wolfe makes the tag and Hernandez comes in quickly with the slingshot shoulderblock. Hernandez lifts up Angle on his shoulder and drops down, shades of A-Train’s old finished, for a near fall. Hernandez tags Desmond back in, and Angle catches him. Angle off the ropes, but Desmond getting a knee up and quickly goes back to Angle’s arm. Desmond with a nice rolling armbar, countered to an ankle lock, and Anderson has the ref while Desmond taps. Desmond rolls Angle into the turnbuckle and tags in Hernandez, who rams the shoulder into Angle who fires him in the corner. Angle with the corner clothesline, then gets caught coming in the second time as Hernandez gets the boot up and rolls to the top rope. Angle catches Hernandez on the top armdrags him off the top rope and now both men are down. Angle goes for the tag and Anderson drops down, as Desmond is tagged in. Desmond misses a clothesline and Kurt answers with three of his own and nails the belly to belly. Angle punches Anderson, then clotheslines Hernandez out of the ring, but takes his eyes off Desmond. Desmond catches Angle in the Hammerlock drop for the near fall, as Desmond is shocked. Desmond sets Angle on the top for the Tower of London, but Angle counters into the Angle Slam. Angle pulls the straps down and Anderson tags himself in, kicks Angle and tosses him out then covers Desmond for the win. 3.75/5 a fun chaotic little match actually, was fun watching no one trusting each other, made the match better than expected.

7. Samoa Joe makes his way to the ring. Joe has a microphone and says he came out for one reason, and calls AJ Styles to the ring. AJ comes out with Ric Flair and they head to the ring, as AJ is in a suit as Flair calls for a mic. AJ stays on the ramp as Joe says he never thought he’d say it but AJ disgusts him. Joe says he’s known AJ a long time and says they didn’t rest on their laurels but gave it everything they had for the fans. Joe says the most epic clashes in TNA involved AJ Styles and Samoa Joe, which is true but Daniels should be in there too. Joe says AJ used to be a warrior and has sold out now. AJ Warrior? That would’ve been funnier then AJ Flair. Picture AJ with Warrior’s makeup and tassels, doing the rope shake and grunting! Flair now has the mic and says he wants to establish one thing; AJ is the champion and the flagship of TNA. Flair says Joe will learn respect, and Joe says he can come down and try to teach him respect but then he’ll be limping to the hospital after. Joe says AJ was the last thing for the boys to believe in and he cheated the people out of a champion. AJ says Joe turned more coats then a dry cleaner, and was once with the Frontline, then the Main Event Mafia and then started the Nation of Violence. AJ asks how that’s going now the Mafia’s money is gone and tells him to go commentate with Taz, and warns Taz he’ll probably turn on him too. Joe says he knows his transgressions but there is one difference between them, when a newcomer came in he stood up to them, where as AJ puckered up and kissed the ring of the new Sugar Daddy. AJ removes the sunglasses and jacket as Joe readies for him. AJ jumps in and Joe opens up on Styles pounding him in the corner. Joe goes for the Muscle Buster, but Flair nails Joe in the balls and now they double team Joe. AJ and Flair hammer on Joe as refs storm the ring, but they can’t stop AJ. Flair grabs the mic and asks Joe if he understands now. AJ and Flair head up the ramp as we go to commercial. We come back as AJ is leaving and runs into Bischoff who asks if he’s proud of himself, and he says it was phenomenal. Eric says it sounds like they have a great night but because the match is so important Sunday and given the history they’re adding a special ref. AJ asks who they’ll trust, and Eric says himself. Eric says he will be the referee in the title match on Sunday night and he will call it straight down the middle. We now go to Taz and Mike Tenay as they recap the card for Against All Odds. The Eight Card Stud Tournament with Angle/Anderson, Hernandez/Morgan, Wolf/Dinero, Abyss/Foley in the opening round, which looks like a great tournament. Also scheduled Nasty Boys v. Team 3D which is going to be horrible. The main event will be AJ Styles v. Samoa Joe for the World Title with Eric Bischoff refereeing, which should be good. We now see Angle leaving the building and Hulk stops him and says it’s not going to happen. Angle says he knew Hulk couldn’t be trusted and Hulk says if he’s hell bent on getting destroyed he won’t stand in the way and it will happen in his house as he opens the door. Hulk says maybe while the beat him down someone will save him and send Angle to the ring. Angle says he’s the boss and will probably see all three in the ring. After the commercial Angle is in the ring calling out Hall and Waltman, and we see them come in. Angle nails Pac and hammers him as Hall takes forever to get to the ring. Angle catches Hall coming in and knocks him on his drunken ass. Angle hammers Hall now and goes for the ankle lock, but Waltman nails Angle with brass knucks. They double team Angle and hammer him with the brass knucks and out comes Hulk Hogan to the rescue? Hulk takes his time coming to the ring, as Waltman and Hall continue to hammer Angle. Waltman and Hall hold the ropes for Hogan as he comes in the ring and they all congratulate each other. Hall passes the knucks to Hogan and gets them to pick up Angle. Hogan rears back and clobbers Hall with the knucks then nails Waltman as well, knocking both out cold.

Match Recap:

1. D’Angelo Dinero beat Orlando Jordan 3.75/5
2. Matt Morgan squashed Suicide 1/5
3. Doug Williams beats Amazing Red 4/5
4. The Beautiful People beat Tara and Angelina Love 4/5
5. Kurt Angle & Ken Anderson beat Desmond Wolfe & Hernandez 3.75/5

Overall a great episode of TNA, even the squash match was fun to watch. A great buildup to the PPV on Sunday and it looks like it might be a great show. I have one complaint about the PPV, where the hell is the knockouts? They were used great this week, and it would’ve been easy to add them to the PPV, make it a six knockout match and add in Taylor to team with Tara and Angelina. Was a great show tonight though, and hope the PPV is great too.

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