Chris' Blog

TNA Impact: Nash and Foley work the shortest main event ever

TNA Impact – February 5, 2010

Well, we’re now one month into the regime of Hulk-a-mania, and it’s been a very interesting month. We’ve had some good and some bad, with the worst being the remake of Montreal. The Ric Flair and AJ Styles stuff has actually been good, and maybe Flair is going to be an asset for TNA. AJ was always one of the best in the company, but was never a good talker. Maybe having the Nature Boy with him will turn Styles into a good promo man. Of course the bad part is that we still have Hall, Nash, Waltman and the Nasty Boys stinking up the shows. Hopefully at least four of those people will be gone after the PPV, especially the Nasty Boys. Last week on Impact we have the qualifiers for the TNA 8 Card Stud Tournament, and qualified so far is Desmond Wolfe and Hernandez. I have to say, so far so good, as I like both of them. Let’s see who qualifies tonight.
We open with the recap from last week of Bischoff, Hogan and Mick Foley, where Bischoff told Foley to work with him or Jeremy Borash and Abyss will be gone. We also see footage of the Orlando Incident, where Hebner admits he was paid off and Hogan telling Angle to respect him. They also show Waltman and Hall attacking Angle, plus highlights of Jarrett and Anderson’s match.
Mike Tenay and Tazz open the show and mention that tonight we have two qualifiers plus three title matches tonight.
1. Brutus Magnus v. Ken Anderson. This is the third qualifier match for the tournament. Well, I hate Magnus, but he’s been here for a while so I’d rather see him win it. Kennedy, I mean Anderson does his opening spiel, and says Hulk Hogan called him the future which means it must be true. Anderson with a quick knee to Brutus, and opens up on him, but Magnus fires back quickly. The ref pulls Magnus out of the corner, distracting him and allowing Anderson to hit a low dropkick and now Anderson begins the offense. Anderson whips Brutus into the far corner, and then rams him head first into the buckle, followed up by stomping on Brutus. Remember when Magnus debuted as a gladiator, boy that lasted long. Anderson whips in Magnus, but gets caught with a boot, followed by the leaping back elbow. Magnus quickly drops him with that weird looking arm neckbreaker thing, and then lifts Anderson on his shoulders. Anderson fights out by raking the eyes and hits a Mic Check for the win. 2.5/5 not a bad match, but way too short. Probably wasn’t more than three minutes, just checked it and about 2:40, which was pathetic. TNA needs to focus on more longer, better matches and less backstage shit. Speaking of which, we go backstage to see Foley pulling into the arena, which was exciting! Christy now with Angle, who faces Tomko, and says Hulk looked him in the eye, and then had his jackals attack him last week. Angle says it ends tonight, and tells Hulk to expect a visit tonight.
2. Eric Bischoff makes his way to the ring, great more yapping instead of matches. Eric says it’s good to be here again, and last week Hulk made it clear to Foley he had to work with Eric. Eric says he’s disappointed in Foley and his decision will cost him dearly, and of course this brings out Mick. Mick comes down the ramp; I hate that ramp by the way, and tell Eric his reputation in this business is there is something wrong with him. Not because he would do anything, but because he likes almost everyone and refuses to say anything bad about people. Foley mentions Marcus Bagwell, Paul Heyman and Jim Hellwig, but he says he likes everyone but Eric is the exception. Mick says he gave everything for this business, while Eric just slid in as an announcer; he calls Eric the worst ever. Tazz chimes in with a classic, as he says Mick must’ve never heard of Mike Adamle, which was great! Foley says Eric weaseled his way to power and says maybe he’s not old school, but he can’t stand Eric. Eric says it’s not about the two of them, it’s about his decision. Foley says he can mess with his life, and he loves being a part of TNA, but when he was young he was saving every dime. Foley says he does it so he doesn’t have to answer to idiots like Bischoff, and tells Eric how dare he mess around with Jeremy Borash and Abyss’ careers. Foley says the Impact Zone would shut down without JB, and the fact he doesn’t know that shows he knows nothing about TNA. Eric cuts him off and says if he doesn’t want to be on the same page, then he’s going to turn the page and write the next chapter of the Foley story. Foley says Eric has learned nothing since killing WCW, and Foley’s been working on this company while Eric was making reality shows. Mick says he knows wrestling won’t last forever, and the relationship is over, but Foley won’t stay and watch Bischoff ruin it. Foley leaves the ring, and Eric says those two names of Foley’s friends, Eric has their futures in his hands. Eric says tonight Foley will face Kevin Nash in a no dq match, as Foley turns his back and leaves. We go backstage to JB and Abyss, as Abyss asks JB if he’s going to be ok. JB says does it sound like it, he just came to get his last check, and he worked for Eric ten years ago and nothing changed. He says when Eric is around no one is ok, and walks away from Abyss. From there we go to Tara and Christy Hemme, Christy says there is history between Angelina and Tara, and Tara says Angelina made her life miserable when she debuts. Tara continues by saying since Angelina returned she has changed and earned her respect, and says she is ready for her. Tazz gets another classic, as he calls tonight Night of Champions, a WWE PPV!
3. Team 3D v. Matt Morgan & Hernandez. Tazz again gets a great line by asking if Hernandez has ever been to Connecticut, as he says it’s not very nice ever. Team 3D needs to just disappear, they’re disgracing their legacy now, as Tenay says a win tonight would make them twenty four time champions, which is just ridiculous. Bubba and Hernandez start out, and Bubba gets him in the corner, and we get a clean break. Bubba with a side headlock, whipped in and blocks Hernandez’s clothesline, then Hernandez blocks Bubba’s. Bubba whipped in, and a shoulderblock from Hernandez, but he misses the corner charge. Bubba tosses him in the far corner and hits a corner clothesline, but Hernandez catches him with a boot and pulls himself to the top. Bubba slams Hernandez off the top and drops an elbow for a near fall. D-Von tagged in, and hammers Hernandez who fires back with a knee and tags in Morgan. Morgan misses a clothesline and D-Von hammers him and hits a flying shoulder then drops the leg. D-Von caught coming off the ropes, as Matt nails a discus clothesline and tags in Hernandez. Hernandez twists the head of D-Von, who fights his way out, and comes off the ropes but runs into Supermex, then sets him on the top rope. Hernandez goes for a superplex, but D-Von bites his head and knocks him off then lands a diving headbutt. Both men are down, and make the tag, and now Matt and Bubba slug it out. Bubba goes for the full nelson bomb, but Matt with a series of elbow, but Bubba avoid the boot and nails a German Suplex. Hernandez runs in and gets a Samoan drop, then a double team on Matt for a near fall. Hernandez gets double teamed, as Matt is on the outside, team 3D goes for the What’s Up, but the Nasty Boys push D-Von off the top. Hernandez grabs Bubba, who goes for the full nelson bomb, but gets pushed into Morgan’s Carbon Footprint for the win. 3/5 not a bad match actually, but the interference sucked. After the match the Nasty’s run D-Von into the post and have a chair as they go for Bubba, but Matt and Hernandez make the save. Team 3D get up, and Matt and Hernandez explain the situation, and team 3D thank the champs and hand them their titles as they leave.
4. Jesse Neal v. Samoa Joe. Well, glad to see Joe, it’s been a while it seems. Tenay reminds us he has the world title shot from feast or fired, I forget all about that as he doesn’t carry the case. Jesse jumps Joe before the bell, well that’s going to get him killed. Jesse hammers Joe quickly, and comes off the ropes, but Joe with a T-Bone Suplex, then hammers Jesse in the corner. Joe whips him in the far corner and follows in; Jesse’s doomed here as Joe’s killing him now. Joe picks him up by the Mohawk, and Jesse rakes the eyes, and comes off the ropes with a forearm. Jesse climbs the ropes, and dives, but Joe just walks away and Jesse crashes and burns, that was funny actually. Joe with the quick slaps now, and then whips Jesse in and hits the high knee in the corner. One Muscle Buster later and Jesse’s counting the lights! 2/5 quick squash match, but still fun to watch. Best part was Joe just walking away from Jesse’s dive. We go to Christy Hemme who’s chasing Hulk through the halls, as she tells him what Angle said. Hulk says he had nothing to do with it and to tell Kurt he’s easy to find.
5. D’Angelo Dinero v. AJ Styles. Dinero goes quickly to the arm, and AJ pushes him in the corner then a cheap shot from Styles. AJ turns his back on Pope, who slaps Styles and nails a drop toe hold, then back to the arm. AJ reverses and goes for a slam, but Pope slides down and drives the elbows in the head, as the Pope does a Dusty Rhodes dance. AJ quickly rolls to the floor as we go to commercial. We come back and Pope whips AJ in, but AJ with a shoulderblock, and now chops the Pope. Another whip in, followed by the leapfrog and the vintage AJ dropkick! AJ stomps Pope and does the bottom rope hotshot, as Tazz says he was with the Pope at a strip club last night. We now have a chopping contest, and AJ gets the advantage and puts Pope in a rear chinlock. AJ starts to choke Dinero on the ropes, and follows with a nice snap Suplex for a near fall. AJ with the ground and pound on D’Angelo, as Tazz asks if Tenay is allowed in the locker room. Pope goes for a sunset flip and gets a near fall, but AJ fires back with a huge back elbow, then back to the rear chinlock. Pope fights his way out, but AJ takes him down by the hair and stomps the Pope’s head. AJ readies for a big right, but Pope blocks and fires back now, and Pope with a quick series of punches, then an inverted atomic drop, followed up with the flying shoulder for a near fall. AJ rakes the eyes and then hits a Pele on the Pope, as he falls near Flair who’s screaming at Pope, who pulls himself up in the corner. AJ misses the Stinger Splash, and Pope chops him in the ropes, and then goes for the Coronation, the slide on the ropes thing, but AJ moves and Pope is down as Flair struts. AJ waits for Pope to get up, and goes for a Suplex but Pope reverses into a roll up for three! 4/5 a very good TV match, and nice upset win for the Pope. Didn’t see that coming at all, what a surprise. Flair quickly jumps Pope and hammers him in the corner, and now they double team Pope, but Samoa Joe makes the save! Joe hammers AJ, as Flair comes from behind and chops Joe, Joe shrugs it off as Flair begs off in the corner. AJ with a chop block takes down the big Samoan, and they work over Joe, but Pope back up and Joe clotheslines Flair out and they go after AJ who bails as we go to commercial. We come back and Flair has the microphone, and asks Joe if he wants to die tonight. Flair says Joe should know better as this is the new TNA. Joe tells Flair to shut up, and tells AJ he’s a scumbag. Joe says he doesn’t care, even when he hated him he was a champion and he gave it up for an overpriced suit and wholesale hookers. Flair looks like he’s going to have a stroke, as Joe says he’s going to remind AJ how to be a man and champion. Joe says he’s cashing in his title shot at Against All Odds, which should be a great match. AJ and Flair retreat back, as Joe says AJ will face the inevitable, and tells Pope let’s show them what inevitable is. We cut to Christy with the always stunning Angelina Love, who looks so hot in blue. Just saying is all. Christy asks her about the Beautiful People, and Angelina says she knows them and taught them everything they know, but not everything she knows. She says she would’ve never replaced herself and asks how that’s working for them. She says tonight three may be her lucky number, it’s mine. Angelina says she’s awesome at revenge. We go to Bischoff with Eric Young and Kevin Nash, as Bischoff pretends not to know who Young is. Bischoff asks Young to leave, and says he probably won’t remember his name. Eric tells Nash he needs a favor, for Nash to destroy Foley tonight. Nash mentions Waltman and Hall don’t have contracts, and Eric says it’s because they are screw-ups and it is what it is. He tells them they play their own tune, and if Nash likes it he can play it too, or destroy Foley tonight. Christy is now with Foley, as she asks if he will fall in line. Foley says he was told to fall in line or lace them up, and he’s lacing up tonight. She mentions the bad blood between Foley and Nash, Foley says the more he thinks about Nash the angrier he gets as Abyss runs in panicking. Abyss asks if he will fall in line, and Foley says he will take care of it and his job is fine. Foley asks Abyss to stay out of the match, and Abyss begrudgingly makes the promise.
6. Kurt Angle v. Tomko. This is the fourth match in the qualifiers, which Angle should win. I like Tomko, but he could never be a main event guy, ever. Angle quickly nails a German Suplex, but Tomko back with a kick and now they’re face to face. Angle with a headbutt, then clotheslines Tomko out of the ring and he follows. Kurt rams Tomko in the steps and throws him back in. Angle rushes at Tomko, who powerslams him and whips him in the corner, and nails the corner clothesline, then whips him hard into the ringpost shoulder first. Tomko with another powerslam for a two count, then moves into a single arm chinlock move, but Angle fights out and comes off the ropes, right into a two hand chokeslam. Tomko climbs the ropes, but Angle springs up and tosses his down with an arm drag and both men are down. Well, it’s gone longer than I expected it too. Angle now nails the triple German Suplex, but on the third Tomko fights out, but misses the charge in. Angle hits the Angle Slam for a near fall, as Angle readies Tomko launches a huge clothesline on Angle. Tomko waits for Angle to get up and runs at him, but Angle moves and nails multiple German Suplexes on the big man. The straps of Angle come down, and Angle into the Ankle Lock and Tomko taps. 3/5 a good TV match, but the outcome was pretty obvious. The multiple German Suplexes looked amazing on a man that size, very cool. We now see Angelina and Tara heading to the ring; I hope Angelina wins, but first a quick recap of TNA’s European Tour. Hulk is now with Kevin Nash; Nash tells Hulk about his conversation with Bischoff and asks Hulk about giving Waltman and Hall another chance. Hulk says they’ve had too many chance, and Nash has done everything he can do for them and tells his to start away from them. Nash says he’ll do it tonight, but keep an open mind.
7. Tara v. Angelina Love. We get the recap of Angelina and The Beautiful People feud. Have I said I like Angelina yet, she’s so hot? I remember her when she worked Indy shows around here, in her pre-implant days. Same can be said for Eric Young and Cody Deaner who worked a lot of the local shows around here. Anyways, I hope Angelina gets the title back, but I don’t like her new music, just doesn’t suit her at all. The bell rings, and we get a lock up, and Tara with a side headlock takedown on the challenger. Tazz says a side headlock from a woman might be enjoyable, well considering where the head winds up…Angelina tries to roll out, but Tara cranks it on and Angelina uses a leg scissor to gets out, and Tara flips out into a bridge. Angelina back with a backslide, but Tara moves to an armbar as we go to commercial. We come back and Tara still with the armbar, they go to a test of strength now, and Angelina flips out and into an armbar of her own. Angelina drives a knee to the back and twists the arm of Tara, who cartwheels out and into an armbar of her own. Tara falls out of her top, as we have boob blurrage now. Angelina with a single leg takedown for a near fall, then rams Tara in the corner, but a second time gets reversed and Angelina headfirst into the buckle. Tara whips her in, and Angelina jumps over into a roll up. Tara nails the spinning side slam for a near fall, as Tara goes for the Widow’s Peak Angelina fights out and whips her in. Tara still hanging out as we still have blurring, damn censors, course I’d rather it was Angelina, but I digress. Angelina misses a big boot, as Tara rolls under and goes for Widow’s Peak, countered to a roll up, but Tara rolls through for the win. 4/5 a very good match between two amazingly talented women. This is how you do a women’s title match WWE. Tara still hanging out as she holds her title proudly, does she not realize it or is she just an exhibitionist? Tara extends a hand to Angelina and helps her up, and here comes The Beautiful People. Lacey nails Angelina in the back, and they triple team Angelina as Tara just stands in the corner, then she makes the save. Tara and Angelina fight off The Beautiful People, as Velvet winds up trapped between Tara and Angelina. Lacey and Madison go after Tara and Angelina, and Velvet makes her escape. Tara and Angelina stand proud in the ring, as we see Hall and Waltman sneak into the building. We now go to Angle storming into Hogan’s office, as he yells at Hulk about Hall and Waltman attacking. Hogan says he won’t give them contracts, but being accused of hiring them. Hogan says Angle’s temper is going to blow this opportunity, and Angle says he doesn’t trust Hulk and knows what he’s about. Angle says he won’t get screwed like Hogan does with other, and this is Hulk’s last warning. Hulk tells him to get out of the office, and Angle storms out.
8. Mick Foley v. Kevin Nash. Mick comes out with the barbed wire baseball bat, while Nash brings out an entire shopping cart of weapons. Nash empties the cart in the ring, and grabs a trash can, which Foley nails with the bat. With only four minutes left, this is going to be one of the shortest main events ever. Foley hammers the trash can, so Nash grabs a chair and Foley hammers the chair with the bat now. Nash grabs a hockey stick and sweeps the legs of Foley, and then grabs the bat and tries to grind it across Foley’s face. Foley tries to fight off the bat, and nails a low blow on Nash as the bat tumbles out. Foley with a running forearm on the big man, who rolls out of the ring, but Mick stays on him and rams his head into the barricade. Nash rammed into the apron, and now Mick with a series of rights and climbs in the ring. Nash back in, as Foley has what looks like a baking sheet and hesitates as Nash nails the big boot for the win. DUD, what a crappy match, was about two minutes and was boring as Hell. Foley hesitated because it was the picture of Foley and Abyss, as we see Hall and Waltman storm the ring. Hall literally looks like he has no idea where he is. Waltman gets in the face of Nash and Hall cheapshots Nash then Hall with the spinkick. Hall and Waltman stomp Nash now, as Foley tries to get up and Hall hammers Foley. Hall and Waltman stand over Nash and Foley, and leave them lying in the ring as we fade to black. Great a Nash & Foley v. Hall & Waltman match for the contracts at the PPV I bet.

Match Recap

1. Brutus Magnus lost to Mr. Anderson 2.5/5
2. Matt Morgan & Hernandez beat Team 3D 3/5
3. Samoa Joe squashed Jesse Neal 2/5
4. D’Angelo Dinero upset AJ Styles 4/5
5. Kurt Angle beat Tomko 3/5
6. Tara pinned Angelina Love 4/5
7. Kevin Nash beat Mick Foley DUD

Well, two great matches and two good matches, but the rest was throwaway, the knockouts had a great match and so did Dinero/AJ, which saved the show for me. The tournament idea might be good, but they have to give all the matches enough time, so that limits the rest of the show. An eight man tournament would mean seven matches, plus the Joe/AJ match and the god awful Nasty Boys/Team 3D match, which means we probably won’t have an X title match or tag titles. Hopefully they can squeeze the knockouts in somehow, maybe a 10 knockout match with Lacey, Velvet, Madison, Daffney, and Traci Brooks v. Tara, Angelina, Taylor Wilde, Sarita, and ODB. Or even make it an eight knockout match, something just so we get Angelina, Madison, Daffney and Taylor on PPV? Is that too much to ask? And what happened to the Knockout Tag Titles, I assume they’re dead now with Kong gone? I need more Knockouts and less backstage crap. Anyways, all in all this was not the best episode, but not the worst. The four good matches make up for the three bad matches, the Brutus/Anderson match could’ve been good if they scrapped out some of the backstage crap and gave them ten minutes.


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